"We never just stop loving someone. We just learn to try to live without them"
It was a rainy summer morning. Rohan paced fast towards the
main entrance hall of his college. After getting to the hall he raced upstairs
as he was already too late for his first classes. He was striding towards his
classroom looking behind for the muddy footmarks he had left on the floor when
he collided with someone which made him go out of balance and he fell
instantly. As he looked up a hand reached towards his face to help him get up.
It was a girl with dark brown silky hairs, plastic skin and a faint smile. It
took him time to respond to her. He girl too was in an utter urgency to reach
the class. Rohan, however, helped himself stand up and firmly said sorry. It
was followed by the girl’s gentle nod. That day the class was full of noises
and the teacher was busy in introducing all the students about the college and
the faculties.
Classes ended soon that day. There was something that was
going into Rohan’s mind when he was reading a novel that night. It was the face
of the girl with he had collided that morning. He couldn’t help himself not
recalling the face. There was a voice inside him urging him to talk to the
girl.
Next morning he again got up late. Without having a
breakfast he rushed towards the college. As he reached the gate of the college
a faint fragrance of some talcum powder touched his nostrils. He spun around to
see a girl with a long ponytail wearing an adorable pink suit. It was girl he
was recalling last night. Without even thinking he let a word pass by his
mouth.
‘Hi’, he said.
‘Hey’, the girl responded.
He felt blank as he didn’t know what to say next.
‘I… I’m Rohan.’ He said after a brief gap.
‘I know. I am Ritika.’
‘Hmm... . Look I’m sorry for yesterday. I was rushing up for
the class and didn’t see you.’ he apologized.
‘It’s okay, for I too didn’t see you. Actually I was too in
a hurry to catch classes.’ she said smiling.
The conversation ended as Ritika realized that she was
getting late for the classes.
‘I think we should again get running, for we are losing the
classes.’ she said with an urgent tone.
That day Rohan felt that there was something in her that was
attracting him towards her. But he wanted to let this feeling go. Days passed
and Rohan made his routine to get to the college early and roam around the
stairs in order to catch some moments to talk to her.
Ritika was a bit skeptic about boys. Her thoughts were
lighted further by her friends. Gradually, she started distancing from Rohan. After
the last class of Saturday, Ritika paced rapidly towards the stairs with some
of her friends. Rohan was just behind them when he saw a metal bar extending
out of the corner of the stair boundary was just few inches away from Ritika’s
back. He felt his guts swollen as she jerked towards the bar. Without thinking
a bit, he placed her arm on her back. The pain that followed by the piercing of
the bar was nothing compared to the relief he got to see her safe. Ritika
turned instantly feeling someone behind her. Her mouth fell silent to see Rohan
trying to touch her back. Without saying a bit she left off. Rohan didn’t say
anything either. He just tried to hide his profusely bleeding palm from her but
her friends saw it. After she left, Rohan asked her friends not to tell her
anything about what he actually did that day.
Two days passed but Ritika didn’t come to the college. It
was Tuesday when she came. But that day wasn’t the same as earlier. Rohan
wasn’t lurking around the stairs and nor was Ritika smiling anymore. Both
attended classes but neither of them turned their eyes on each other. Rohan
just got outside the main gate when a pair of powerful hands caught his from
back and smashed his head in the wall. As he realized what had just happened,
he saw a tall dark muscular boy with a bunch of other strong men were there. He
punched the boy back and instantly he heard a caring sound from behind. It was
Ritika caring for her brother as he got a punch. Rohan was about to give up but
now there tincture of confusion and pain of disbelieve. Even knowing that the
men will beat him up badly, he started punching them. He fell and rose again
until he got some serious injuries and fell unconscious.
Ritika was also getting mixed emotions of guilt and anger.
But until now the anger about Rohan’s touching him dominated the guilt of
feeling herself responsible for his condition. As she entered the class, she
was stopped by her friends. They asked her as to why she did this. They
explained her about what actually happened that day and why Rohan did that. It
left Ritika dumbfounded. It was now that the guilt was the only thing left for
her to feel.
Her eyes waited for Rohan to see him but Rohan was nowhere
to be seen. Some said that he has migrated from the town while some asserted
him of being in coma. None knew about his real condition. After a month, a man
in his forties visited the college with wet eyes. Ritika was down in the hall
when she confronted the man. He was the father of Rohan. It has been about a
month when he did Rohan’s final rites. The reason of his death, what Rohan
told, was that he met with an accident on the way back his home. But his father
knew the real story. He had nothing to say to her but to give her Rohan’s
dairy.
The days blurred and the empty desks taunted her, day after
day, blaming her, forcing her to believe he was gone, but she could see him so
clearly, like she had just left the class early, she held his voice, and she
saw him smile, sometimes she even smiled back.
Ritika opened the diary with tears in her eyes. The incident
had left her disturbed and distorted but again it was his words that pacified
her. The last page of his diary said, “I will be alive even after my death if I
see her smiling with her hands extending towards me”. And the very first words
on the first page were ‘The ponytail’.
